WHAT I LEARNED FROM GETTING RAPED BY AN ENERGY HEALER
For most of 2018, I was living a lie.
I haven’t been sharing my whole truth, I’ve been hiding.
For months, I was in denial about this, put on a strong front, and just hoped it would go away.
It took me five months before I could even admit I needed professional help.
It took me nine months to work up the courage to tell my family.
***
In August 2018, on a sunny afternoon the week before my 30th birthday, I was raped by an “energy healer” alone in my apartment.
Six weeks later, days before being the maid of honor in my best friend’s wedding, I discovered I was pregnant from the rape, and proceeded to have an abortion in the following days.
***
Less than one year into my new entrepreneurial path as a coach, I felt spiritually and energetically open for the first time in my life. I didn’t realize at the time, but I was seriously lacking boundaries, and attracting all sorts of new people into my life because of it.
In the weeks before I met him, I’d been gaining an awareness of stories I’d been telling myself for years…
Why I felt better off alone than in a relationship…
Why it didn’t feel safe to own my feminine energy…
Why attention from men made me feel uncomfortable…
Why my sexual energy felt shameful.
I knew I didn’t want these beliefs to continue to control my life and I was ready to heal them and move forward. So of course it felt synchronistic when I met this man who told me he was a quantum energy healer. I was doing Reiki (another form of energy healing) at the time, as well as life coaching, and he suggested we do an energy exchange sometime.
A week later, he texted me to set it up and I agreed to it.
Even before he arrived at my place, something inside of me said this was not smart, that something was off. I chose to ignore it and told myself I needed to “be more open.”
He did a “reading” of my chakra system and told me I had blocks in my root and sacral chakras. I immediately told him that resonated with me because I’d been realizing all these narratives I’d been playing.
He offered to clear it and heal it all, and said the process would awaken my kundalini and would I be open to that?
I told him I’d heard of stimulating the lower chakras for manifestation, and is that what he meant? He said “Something like that.”
The next hour or so included him manipulating me into taking all my clothes off piece by piece until I was laying naked on my reiki table. He had me turn on music, close my eyes and start to do a three-part breath, with essentially sends you into a different dimension.
I expressed my discomfort, that the whole thing felt weird and I had a lot of shame coming up. He told me over and over that this was a safe space and the work he was doing was healing.
He chanted in a different language, I could feel him moving energy up my chakra system and out of my throat. He was touching me down there, which I had anticipated based on his allusiveness. Something in my distorted state of mind thought letting a stranger touch me was necessary for healing.
What I wasn’t prepared for was when he suddenly climbed on top of the table and proceed to start having sex with me. We hadn’t explicitly discussed this. How was this happening? Had I misunderstood what he meant?
It took all the breath out of my body. I went completely and utterly rigid. My physical body froze, and I left it for a period of time. Smashing his face into mine, he grunted why I wasn’t making any noise and demanded that I kiss him. I went into complete shock and remained motionless until it was over.
Afterward, I was so confused. I rationalized that I was a naive spiritual rookie because he boasted that he reserved this “first and second chakra work for only 10-20% of clients” and “some women got offended if he didn’t.” He told me he practiced tantric sex and could withhold ejaculation. I believed him and was not under the impression that he had.
After he left, I convinced myself that I was being a prude and asked for it. Feeling weird, I thought that maybe this is what people do and there are spiritual healing practices I’m unaware of. I decided to put this experience in a little box and tuck it away in the back of my mind- I couldn’t bare to think about it.
***
Had I not gotten pregnant, I’m not sure I would have ever consciously acknowledged and understood what happened.
Your mind has a way of running from the truth, doesn’t it? I busied myself with life- the next few weeks filled with my 30th birthday, a bachelorette party, and two weddings.
The word “rape”, and the realization that I’d been raped, didn’t hit me until I peed on two sticks and got two plus signs back around five weeks later. Suddenly, I woke up to the truth.
Pure fury. A complete invasion of my body. I was enraged.
For a long time, I couldn’t understand why I didn’t go into fight or flight. I think I’d been conditioned to believe that a rape has to be violent, and that our instinct is to scream and fight back and not allow it to happen. This experience showed me this isn’t always the case.
My therapist taught me months later that there is a third response that no one ever discussed: Freeze. This is common for rape or sexual assault. Paralyzation was my body’s instinctual way of escaping the trauma.
Getting the abortion made the whole trauma feel more real. It felt isolating, and quiet. No one at the clinic asks you why- as I’m sure many women don’t want to talk about it. I wanted to scream out my why. Instead I stayed quiet.
Please hear me now with these thoughts:
>> If you have experienced an assault before, and you are still shaming and judging yourself for freezing and not fighting- please forgive yourself. Sometimes we cannot control how our bodies respond, and it’s not your fault. It never was. I hope me telling this story gives you permission to free yourself of your guilt.
>> If you ever had to make the choice to get an abortion- please know that I see you and I stand with you. Your why does not matter- it is a difficult experience for anyone.
***
The worst shame comes from situations that you could have controlled, but didn’t. I felt like I betrayed myself and lost all sense of trust in my judgment from ignoring my intuition.
What confused me and triggered me more, was that this space that I was so passionate about- spirituality, energy, self-growth, suddenly felt tainted. It was a rude awakening realizing that there are people in the spiritual space that are preying on the vulnerability of others in so many ways.
I refused to let one man ruin my calling. In fact, I think I knew deep down that this all had a purpose, and that I got to use this for good in some way. But I wasn’t there just yet…I chose a complicated path to healing.
I wasn’t ready to tell my family, thinking it would cause them more pain. I also wasn’t in a position to pay for professional mental health support — nor did I feel like I needed it. I deluded myself that I was equipped with the tools to handle things alone.
Over the next few months, I proceeded to “busy” myself with work, burying myself in projects. I felt like a hamster on a wheel, not actually going anywhere.
I legitimately was not myself. I had on a mask and didn’t even realize it. If you saw me on the internet, I was acting like everything was peachy, posting inspirational content and selling new offers. I was acting like a total fraud and my awareness was clouded. I told close friends about it, but put on a strong front, convincing them and myself that I could handle anything.
My business ran almost completely dry for about 5 months. Have you ever had the Universe cut off your income streams as a way of getting you to pay attention? As many entrepreneurs are probably aware- you don’t ever actually have business problems, you have personal problems that bleed into your business.
When you choose to stuff your emotions and traumatic experiences in a closet instead of facing them head on and seeking the support you do need, the stench starts to seep into every area of your life.
It felt like my entire life was crumbling and covered by a dark cloud.
***
January 2019 felt like a fresh start and the beginning of my healing journey. For the first time I sat down and started to process everything.
I did EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) every week for four months with a trauma therapist. I connected a lot of dots, and healed some childhood wounds.
So many of our belief systems, perceptions of ourselves, and our lives are formed when we are kids. The thing you think is the thing, is never really the thing. Everything is connected and runs deep.
The rape was the symptom on the surface, and EMDR helped me to go back and recall the memories, recognize the patterns, and clear the beliefs surrounding me not trusting myself, being afraid to use my voice, and giving my power away.
I did a lot of self reflection, forgiving, accepting, and loving. I began slowly repairing things with my family. But finally feeling ready to tell them what actually happened, just a few short months ago changed everything. The disconnection, weird behavior, random relationship — it all made more sense.
Internally, it felt like a huge weight was lifted and I could breathe again. It also opened the floodgates in my business. It was as if my business had been energetically blocked for months, and suddenly it wasn’t anymore! I signed more clients in the month I told my family than I ever had in a 30 day period.
I felt a new elevated sense of power within me that I hadn’t felt before- it was freedom. Sharing this story really is the next step in my healing process, and I know there is still more to go. I don’t know if you ever feel like you receive a certificate of completion on stuff like this.
My biggest lessons have been with setting boundaries, trusting my intuition, and using my voice.
I finally filed a police report in January, but was still too afraid to move forward with the case. But, I know wasn’t the first woman he did this to. And I’m afraid I won’t be the last. The thought of that haunts me, and I can’t sit by and let that happen.
With my new sense of power in using my voice, I feel a new sense of responsibility. I do not want another woman to have to go through what I went through. Not taking action on this is now a privilege, and I refuse to be that selfish.
Narcissistic and sociopathic men who use spirituality as a front to violate women is not a new concept as I’ve come to realize- but it’s one that needs to be talked about more.
***
Here is what I want to say to you in all of this:
Sometimes we have to break wide open in order to come back in even more fullness than before. We find ourselves in the depths of our shadows.
Also, there is so much power in our vulnerability.
When we choose to stand up and share our truth, even when we’re afraid- of feeling exposed, of what others might think or say, of it being too much, of not wanting to burden others….that is when we embody our true power.
We don’t just heal another layer of ourselves, but we give others an opportunity to heal their own wounds when we tell our stories. I know that me coming out with this will help so many feel less guilt, shame, and isolation.
Please know that you don’t have to hide or pretend your life is perfect. No one has it all together, even if it looks like they do on the internet!
And maybe you’re still processing things, maybe you’re not ready to share just yet, but please, I beg of you- don’t avoid your trauma. It will catch up with you, and if you ignore it long enough, it will affect every area of your life, from finances, to relationships, to health. There is no shame in seeking support.
I want to remind you of the most empowering part of going through something difficult: all challenging experiences have gifts and lessons in them. You chose it at a soul level in order to grow. Can you find peace in that? Can you trust that?
You get to choose whether you want to make victimhood your identity, or if you want to use your experience as an opportunity for growth and a platform to help others heal. Choose growth.
Lastly- remember that your intuition never ever lies to you. Your mind can talk you in or out of anything, your heart can be charged with so much emotion that sometimes it can blind you, but your gut always, always knows. If something doesn’t feel right or good- listen.
I have this deep knowing that me expressing this is just the beginning of a beautiful new chapter of this healing journey. Through this experience I’ve learned we get to create purpose from our pain. And my purpose is even higher than I realized.
I now know that I’m truly meant to empower women to own their truth- all of it. Not just their desires, but their stories, their messiness, their raw soul truth. And then use that truth to create massive impact in the world. You get to feel free, full, and live life overflow. You deserve all of that.
CONTACT BRIE ON HER WEBSITE OR ON INSTAGRAM.
To learn more about getting started with Empire Life in launching and scaling your online empire you can contact Allison, Founder of Empire Life, on Instagram and LinkedIN.
“Giving everyone these tools to observe, withdraw, and not absorb toxic energy is the ultimate way to continue living in our highest selves.”
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Ahahahaha!!! Loved it so much! you a great writer.
I Liked it!
This is my kryptonite. I am so glad that she asked this. Totally relatable.
This is so great!
The “choose one habit” I’m working with is reminding myself throughout the day as obstacles come up …” I am not responsible to fix this situation. I am responsible to be as present as I know how to be in the moment.” and then feel myself energetically connecting with others for support and guidance (my mantra…Be Present and Join)…and I think my family would agree I am much less grumpy not feeling like the one responsible to fix everything all the time!
This is me too. The one thing I’ve never done is track it physically and I think that would be very helpful.
For me to find my grounding, these morning walks are the best! We’re so happy to hear you’ve found your stride!
Feel this might be useful here –> my friend coach Anke Herrmann the author of The Tech Whisperer. Anke gave me a tip on a marketing technique that I am going to start PRACTICING today. Thank you, Allison and Empire Life Team. You’ve been a role model to me for years! Hugs and Love in deep gratitude!
If you think about it, life is really just a tapestry of habits – many of which are not consciously chosen. The trick is to identify which ones you want to keep, which to discard, and what new ones to invite in… 😊
James Clear’s book Atomic Habits is a great resource if you want to understand more about implementing them in your life in a doable way, btw. I hope that is useful!
Thank you so much, Marie.
You are awesome blossom and appreciate your time and effort in everything you do. Been following you for a few years now!
That’s right! Keeping it simple can help out so much.
This is really great. Thank you, Brie, for sharing Your mindset!
These have definitely been my steps to success in achieving my goals – Even just having the habit to do something 3x a week and tracing it can be enough – it doesn’t need to be daily!!! I like to have 3x a week instead of “Mon/Wed/Fri so I have the flexibility to deal with my “real life” and haven’t “lost my chance” if I don’t do it on a Friday 🙂 That’s a system that works for me, anyway. 🙂
Absolutely changed my world, thank you for this one!
Wowza did I ever need this message today!
This was so powerful!
This was an AMAZING interview! Feeling blessed to be a student in Earth school even on the hard days.
Really insightful , It’s hard to fine a Word that describes you, I believe your kindness and understanding of people brings out The best of them, pretty amazing it’s not just the thing about you, it’s your truthfulness and understanding, you are truly blessed
Such kind and wise and loving teachings
The timing of this profound wisdom was perfect for me!
I got teary eye while listening to the conversation of both of you. As Introverts myself it’s hard to to really mingle with other people. But listening to you idea on how to become successful without changing something from me, give me motivation to pursue what I like and not pay attention to what people say against you as long you are not hurting somebody.
Wow, This is a great episode. A big thanks’ to both of you. 🙂
‘I can do it maybe not today but I can do it’
Amazing. I think I will leave the link to this episode on my blog in the future. So important.
Thank you.
Love this episode and it came at just the right time! Focusing on my impact rather than myself is huge for me right now.
1) I assume entrepreneurs were focused on earning money from the time they were young.
2) I am really good at working on my own! I’ve heard entrepreneurship can be lonely, but in that sense I think being introverted can be an advantage.
What a timely message for me! Focus on your purpose, on your why, who can you serve, message and mission, instead of yourself. I’ve been struggling with this for a while, putting myself in some projects then holding back again. Thanks for this video TeamForleo. I finally enrolled in B-school after thinking of it for years. I’m so excited to learn from all of you, work on my transformation so I can serve my audience and live a life by design!
The Video reminded me simply of being okay the way I am.
I don´t have to change who I am, just learn the skills I need to bring my message out there.
This episode was such a great one for me to hear. I, to, am a bit of an introvert. But I also love to teach. I love the prep stage, the admin stage AND the being front and center as the teacher…BUT…then I need to be able to step down, go find a quiet corner, and recharge. This is the part people don’t get, lol. I often tell my kids “you need to stop talking now, I have heard too many words today”. Seriously, I say that several times a week, lol.
We are all so much more capable than we realise, and we can learn so many of the skills we often feel we are lacking.
It’s so important to acknowledge and highlight the differences too, between ‘growing and evolving’ versus ‘changing your personality’ as these are totally different things. This is why I teach person reinvention from the roots of who you already are instead of a “brand new you.”
I definitely struggled when I started my business as I’m an introvert, but then found that offering coaching via email gave me a niche to work with other introverts and seemed to work just as well.
Honor Your Energy
The biggest thing holding me back is the idea that one has to give up everything else in order to build a successful business. I still have a kid at home and want to be there for her and I know that building a business requires a lot of hours that either I don’t have or don’t want to give up right now. I get up at 5:30 to workout and sleep is a priority so the whole “get up before anyone else to work on your business is already happening” plus I’m in school so I have to make time for that. Maybe this all sounds like excuses but I feel like I’m stretched pretty thin. Not complaining here- just not sure where to fit in grow a business too.
Thank you for this mind blowing and life changing video. I can feel the sincerity and so much love in it. Act in love indeed and it will give you peace.
Love and appreciate you and all that you do!
Thank you for your insights, we (your fans) learn a lot from you.
This made me respect and love you even more ❤️, great blog.
Thanks again for bringing up such an important topic.
Thank you Empite Life team. Brilliant as ALWAYS.
Thanks so much for sharing!
That’s incredible Allison, love your work.
Always love reading you! Great content.
Thanks for “nailing it”
Great article Allison and team, and great page.
You rock, Allison! Love your page.
This is sublime advice, as always.
This post is still really valuable, of course! Blessings!
Thank you for existing and being so authentic. Loved this blog!
Thank you for opening up our thinking today! This a good article.
Thanks for sharing your words with us.
Love your work and rarely disagree.
This has to be one of my FAVORITE pieces!!
I am just happy to share and thanks for the great piece Allison.
Allison- you did a fantastic job with this article.
Great article. Wonderful words.
Allison, you are such a remarkable role model
That is amazing Allison, good luck for the future love your page 😀
What a lovely post from our fantastic Allison.
Great words of wisdom!
That was great!
Love you and your message!
You are incredible. I am so grateful for you Allison.
Thank you for this great blog Allison.
Thanks for being you and thanks for this wonderful and actionable article.
one of the best articles i have read from you. LOVE!!!
Thank you for that great blog !
Wishing you nothing but the best and much continued success!
Thank you, Empire Life.
Thank YOU!
I have read this 3 times. Each time I gather something new from it. Thank you for having Brie here. She’s an amazing soul, as are you and your team. Blessings, Barb
I’m so happy to hear that, thank you Barb.
your intentions and soul lead you on a really great path, Brie. Wishing you all our best- always. – Ugo
Thank you Allison for bringing on Brie here to share with us!
I love this, keepin’ it real, Brie. Thanks for being here and sharing this! – Heather
Brie, You always find the most amazing people to interview who have such a wealth of knowledge and brilliance to share – bravo! And thank you for keeping it real ALWAYS!
That goes in the direction of my thoughts about doing my thing and seeing what it leads to.
Brie, in my experience as an empath, learning how to manage my energy field ( aura) helped tremendously in my interpersonal relationships. Learning how to ground in the body and how to manage the energy in my space and clear what isn’t mine, plays a significant role in feeling at ease in the body. When one is in command of her/his own energy, one doesn’t take in the stimuli of the environment in a way that makes it uncomfortable in the body, it’s about mastering our own energy. I hope my insight gives you an idea of which direction to look. Blessings.
You are so right about this! This experience taught me how to be a master of my own energy. Thank you!
Thank you, Empire Life. I’ll check it out!
Yes, thanks!
Incredibly well-written article, and a great read.
Have learned a lot here by following this. Thanks!
Sent this to everyone in my group, especially the women in my life.
Have forwarded this to everyone I know.
This was an eye-opening article, thank you Empire Life and Brie!
Spectacular and well written. This was life-changing.
Thank you, Brie!
From my experience, just wanted to say thank you for being so vulnerable here.
Of course. Our stories are powerful and can help each other feel less alone in our experiences
This was such a heartfelt blog article!
Thank you both for your inspiration!!
My “aha” moment struck when it was pointed out how to define success…
The best takeaway for me is that yes money is emotional and you can actually alter the rules so that you ate making yourself feel contest and successful.
Just a thought: Brie, if you create a channel simple for the purpose of raising money online and stay consistent in your YouTube video uploading and use relevant hashtags in your video tags section “not regular tags but HASHTAGS,” the YouTube algorithm will start ranking your videos differently. Hopefully, this information will help someone free of charge in crowdsourcing online using the awesome power of YouTube video marketing. 🙂
Those are important, of course, but ultimately, they are simply the foundation to something bigger that enables you to dream, soar, and be free. I value freedom more than anything else in the world and the idea that money is connected to freedom, rather than an activity we must do, is where the secret lies for me.
Thanks for the positive vibes!
Again such genuine, real blog content.
What really struck a chord for me was the reference Brie made about just starting. Just starting the healing process. Even if that means you’re at the bottom of the mountain and you know it’ll be a hike, at least you’ve begun to just look at the trek, journey, adventure, opportunity (whatever one can call it! hehe) to then know where you are going.
Yes! I’m so glad this resonated with you!
I think that so often we tend to second guess ourselves and what our gut is trying to say out of fear of looking stupid. At least I know I do.
Totally. Sometimes we have to have an experience of not trusting out gut to learn how to feel it even deeper the next time.
This call was an eye-opener. A “permission click” to follow what’s really in my heart. Thank you both so much for this blog.
Brilliant!
Wow! What an amazing blog.
Yes, Bravo friend!! Thanks for this lovely reminder. I love it!
I love the reminder that true success means having the courage to define it for yourself and giving yourself the time and grace to discover what that is.
Please keep me posted about your healing – you have a small cheering section here in Scotland! xo – Heather
Thank you Heather, that means so much! A few years later now, and I am thriving!
I won’t give up. I’ll figure this out.
Because: Yes, I know so much of what you said. And no, I don’t want it that way anymore in my suffering, I want happiness and healing. Thank you Brie.
Hi! I really wanted to see this blog at once… because today I’m making a lot more money and having a lot more love in my life, than ever before – but still have very little left over.
At the tender age of 51 years, I have finally started working on my relationship with money in a quest to be financially independent. I LOVE that you acknowledge that money is emotional because boy does I get emotional trying to figure this all out. I still have a lot of work to do but I have realized as you so rightly pointed out that I have no confidence in my ability to understand and manage money and I have allowed others to dictate what financial success looks like. I feel like you gave me permission to define my own financial success and attain peace of mind. I am taking away the following:
Not doing anything causes anxiety! So I will take actions, small steps at a time, and give myself grace accepting that this is a journey with twists and turns to navigate. I will prevail as long as I keep on learning and doing.
My biggest takeaway from this is the power of community and how important it is to comment.
You made some really good points there. I looked on the internet for more information about the issue and found most people will go along with your views on this website.
YESSSSSSSS Brie! This is amazing and how it’s done. Be so proud of yourself- you did this! Sending you loads of love!
My big takeaway is: “KNOW YOUR WHY!!”
I have been browsing online for more than 3 hours today,
yet I never found any interesting article like yours.
It is pretty worth enough for me. In my view, if all website owners and bloggers made good content
as you did, the web will be a lot more useful than ever before.
It was good to hear that it is ok to focus on one thing at a time.
Can’t wait to read your book, Redefine, and learn from your wisdom.
Thank you, Brie and Allison. Love
Thank you for all the efforts that you have put in this. Very interesting information.
I read Empire Life’s blogs regularly, but this one triggered something in me. I said to myself: I’ve to get this book, Redefine!
What a GREAT article, Brie!
I’ve been surfing online for greater than three hours as of late,
but I never discovered any fascinating article like yours.
It is pretty valuable enough for me. Personally, if all web owners and bloggers made excellent content material as you did, the net will likely be a lot more helpful than ever before. Thanks!
Great topic that seems to be all I think about lately.
You really make it appear really easy along with your presentation but I find this matter to be actually one thing that I feel I would by no means understand. I’m looking forward to your next published article!
This episode was helpful for me! Taking action and putting in the work.
Thank you so much for sharing!
Hello! I could have sworn I’ve visited this site before but after
browsing through a few of the posts I realized it’s new to me.
Anyways, I’m certainly pleased I found it and I’ll be book-marking it and checking back regularly!
Thank you, Brie and Allison!
I visited several of your sites, thank you for this blog!
Love you guys to the moon for all your epic content!
Oh my oats, you guys! You just keep knocking these – what I like to call – “heart-core” (instead of hardcore – because they hit you were ALLLL the feels live) episodes OUT OF THE PARK. I love it. And I am so grateful. Sitting here in Cape Town, South Africa, giggling, teary-eyed, and inspired because a brave mama woman in the US gave me PERMISSION to “define my own values and beliefs around money and success”.
Oh, brilliant blog – I want to know this toooo!
It is an appropriate time to make a few plans for the longer term and it’s time to be happy.
Thank you so much!
I love this blog article!
Hi Brie!
Thank you so much for always speaking about topics that are so important!
This blog was seriously meant to reach me when it did. Thank you Allison & Brie for sharing your experiences and giving insight. It’s been such a hard month and I’ve been dealing exactly with what you both spoke about in the episode — the fear, the anxiety…thank you both so much!
I enjoyed the episode and thank you for these kind words! I’m so honored to be in your community.
It’s the best time to make some plans for
the future and it is time to be happy. I have read this post
and if I could I desire to suggest you few interesting things
or suggestions. Maybe you can write the next articles referring to this article.
I want to read even more things about it!
Amazing blog article, thanks Brie!!
Wow!!!!! Amazing!!!! Her Energy (Brie) …AMAZING!
Thanks, Allison! You rock!
Thanks for sharing your ideas on this blog.
My biggest takeaway from this blog is to “start where you are”.
Brie, what I loved most is the comments you had made about your story here, and how you are living so well at this point. Thank you.
Massive respect to both of you ladies, Allison and Brie. Thank you for showing up and role-modeling healing and self-love.
Hi there, I found your website by means of Google whilst looking for a similar subject, your web site got here up,
it appears good. I have bookmarked it in my google bookmarks.
Hi there, just turned into an alert to your weblog through Google, and found that it is really informative.
I’m going to watch out for your new article. I will appreciate in case you continue this in future.
Many other people might be benefited from your writing.
Cheers!
Golly, that’s a lot of baggage to leave behind for one blog for me…! 🧳… 🛫 Thanks Brie!
Thank you, for this blog and for introducing us to Brie! I LOVE hearing women talk about money and love and life because we do have a very different relationship with it to men – historically, if nothing else – and it’s so important that we honour our own relationships with it rather than trying to fit in with men’s ‘money boxes’… (AKA: ‘Budgeting ourselves into submission’).
The top takeaway from your blogs – I define success and value for myself. Allison said about her parents – they live simple – that sounds like success and value to me. Thank you for bringing Brie on the Empire Life Blog!
Two years ago my husband was laid off, right before the pandemic. I hadn’t worked in five years, but as an RN, I was able to find a job fairly quickly. Even as a nurse, I didn’t make as much as he did. We struggled and last year we filed for bankruptcy. I’m on a mission to do better financially. I was inspired by your book, Allison, as you gave some great, concrete ways to start changing your financial future. I’m excited to keep reading your book to see how it can help me and my family.
I loved this blog – not one takeaway, but over 30 notes – like that money and love are so emotional, and that you can save for multiple goals, and I am in my fifties! Thanks, Empire Life for bringing in a fresh and simple way to reorganize things, at whatever age or phase in life we are at!
Debtors Anonymous changed my life, it’s not just for debt. Really for any disordered relationship/thinking around money and work.
My takeaway from you is to respect yourself, respect money and love and be able to look in the mirror and like what you see for the right reasons. Taking the time to know the Why and feeling good about doing it your own way!
Wow…so many helpful, positive messages received while reading your blogs —
— “awareness is empowering”
— “success and value when it comes to your money is something you should define
yourself”
— “hard work is understanding WHY you are doing what you’re doing”
and, my favorite…
— “living in the unknown is a lot scarier than living in the known”
Thank you Empire Life!
I like the helpful info you provide in your articles.
I will bookmark your weblog and check again right here frequently.
It is an appropriate time to make some plans for the longer term and it’s time to be happy.
I have read this article thank you!
When I was in my early 30’s I wrote in my journal I’d own a house debt-free when I was 40. What I forgot to write down is I had a husband that didn’t give one thought to finances. We struggled with our different personalities and financial goals, but I was determined not to argue about money, my calling in life was higher than money. I saved for the future regardless of our differences and even got my husband to save 15% of his income and we set it up so he didn’t even see it, taking the pressure off him. As time went on I still desired to pay off our house. When I turned 50 I decided I was going to pay off our house, but with my husband’s blessing and no arguing involved.
It’s an appropriate time to make some plans for the future and it is time to be happy. I’ve read this post and if I could I want to suggest you few interesting things or advice. Maybe you can write the next articles referring to this article. I desire to read even more things about it!
Yes to all of this, thank you for sharing.
This morning I was sitting here very much aware of my financial situation: $798 in checking account; $100 cash; $8,000+ credit card debt (nearly maxed-out); no foreseeable income as a freelancer. Oh yeah, and 67 years old. I prayed for help. Open my email and here is this blog! You’d better believe I paid attention! Somehow I’m not scared anymore, because what you said here really hit home. I’m starting where I am.
What really hit home for me was Empire Life insisting to ask the question “WHY you’re spending money”. I realized that the deeper reason behind my spending is fear of rejection and being alone. I would spend money on my friends and my partner: buying presents, meals, rounds of drinks, letting them stay at my vacation place for free, etc. Deep down there was a belief that people may not like me just for who I am. That I’m not good enough. It’s a hard thing to admit, but a very important one too. I see it as a first step on the journey of building more self-acceptance, self-worth, and self-love. And to think that working on this emotional pattern can also bring me more financial freedom? Mind-blowing! I cannot thank you enough for this insight!
This was a great article. My big takeaway is that what my biggest goal is is okay no matter what anyone else’s goals are or what they say. I am an underspend usually. And that’s ok because I’m saving for bigger things like travel. (🙏). Thanks for all you do. Barbara
Thanks for this blog article! So much of it spoke to me, and I figure I have done half the work. I know exactly what my budget is but the pandemic has been hard, and I am in too much debt for me. I will get serious at looking at why I spend.
O.M.G. I get it. I can hardly put words together to send this comment!?! Allison, I have been an Empire Life insider for YEARS!! You have been part of my squad since the day I left the corporate world to start my own business. I had NO CLUE what I was doing. I never thought I would own a business nor did I want to honestly. But doing what I know I was designed by God to do down here was too important to let fear stop me.
It’s been 10 years and I have had a lot of successes. The one consistent and over-arching thing that creates fear and anxiety and shame in my life is my finances. I didn’t learn growing up. I didn’t have a role model in this space. I graduated college and worked hard and that’s what I do best- work hard. I had no clue what to do with the money I worked so hard to earn.
I am, for the first time in my life, fully 100% self-employed with an income that fluctuates. A lot of what you said resonated with me.
This was so inspiring. It really helps to know that I’m not the only one struggling.
This is a truly beautiful, eye-opening, down-to-earth, realistic money message for all.
It begins with knowing one’s self and knowing one’s ‘Why’ for doing things. Admitting it – Addressing it and – Acting on it.
Also, don’t be a copycat. Do what makes you happy. Being ‘Mortgage Free’ is such a sweet feeling 🙌🏽
Thank you, Ladies.
The big takeaway for me was to actually start looking at my emotional situation. Over the past year, I’ve had health issues that have meant I can’t earn or do as much as I would like while I focus on healing.
Howdy, would you mind letting me know which web host you’re utilizing?
I’ve loaded your blog in 3 completely different internet browsers and I must say this blog loads a lot
quicker than most. Can you recommend a good web hosting provider at a reasonable price? Many thanks, I appreciate it!
Hi Alice, yes, getflywheel is the best one we can recommend at the moment.
Not willing to live in chaos anymore. Taking steps to understand myself better, understand my relationship to money and everything — my why.
I’ll immediately clutch your rss as I can’t to find your
e-mail subscription link or newsletter service. Do you’ve any?
Kindly allow me realize in order that I may just subscribe.
Thanks.
Yes of course, make sure to grab our free sample of the book and then you’ll be on the email list, here -> http://www.empirelifeacademy.com/book
Did your money beliefs change during your evolution from scarcity to abundance? And I loved your answer too: you’re frugal and simple even now when you’re financially liberated. I’ve heard from other videos that you still do your own laundry, grocery shopping, and cooking. That’s an amazingly fresh model: to be financially free and frugal. Maybe, the chores keep you grounded?
Yes, this always this.
I honestly rarely open many emails…but this one caught my eye as I have a lot of work to do here. I already bought the book. Your approach really resonated. I’m terrified and SO ready.
Hi There!
I just want you to know that you are beautiful. Love reading your blog here. Keep spreading happiness. Love your writing style too, by the way.
I like what you guys are up to. Such clever work and
reporting! Keep up the wonderful works guys I’ve included you guys in my own blogroll.
Everything went down as I realize that I should’ve been more focused on what I had. I just love the way you word things in this entire blog, it reminded me of who I was before. You truly are an inspiration.
I am impressed with this website, I am a fan.
I really loved this blog, as well as the UI of this page, is superb.
We’re “wanting” to see the other person’s humanity and humanness; extending grace to myself first and that grace is a “muscle”, and setting boundaries–knowing that it’s okay to say ‘no’ to a situation and sometimes just walk away.
This was a great blog, and it provided me with some very valuable insights and information. Thank you, Brie.
Hi, I do think this is a great website. I stumbled upon it on google 😉 I am going to revisit once again since I book-marked it.
Money and freedom is the best way to change, may you be rich and continue to help others. Thank you Brie for sharing your story here with us!
I love this! I tell my clients all the time that America is purple. We are not as divided as we are told to believe.
I once had a friend meet me for lunch and the first thing she said was, “I don’t think I can be friends with anyone who supports Trump.” I think it was a bit of a test to see if I was a supporter. I wasn’t but didn’t even get into that. I just said, “Oh my gosh, if I did that I wouldn’t be speaking to half of my friends and family.” And then we calmly talked about why they supported him and I think she may have been surprised that there were very legitimate reasons why they voted for his policies but didn’t love a lot of the things he did. Sometimes we feel we understand a situation completely but without truly knowing how someone very different than us has been affected by that situation. I always try to find common ground FIRST and then recognize that we can discuss our differences as a way of learning about another perspective. Thank you for this blog Brie!
I’ve been browsing online more than 4 hours today, yet I never found any interesting article like yours.
It is pretty worth enough for me. In my view,
if all web owners and bloggers made good content as you
did, the web will be a lot more useful than ever before.
I love this! Embracing your oursevles fully is a great way to stand out. I feel like so many people try to stand out by fitting in but that’s just silly. If you scroll on Instagram, there are very few things that actually stand out. My grandmother used to always say “be your weird self.” She was right!
WOOO! Go Brie! Also know that it is truly inspiring for us to hear the work you are dedicating your life and career to. Thank you for sharing! -Harold
It takes in during life challenges in order to have a greater spiritual understanding of life and why certain things happen.
Very inspiring blog post, thank you Allison and Brie. At the moment I’m taking from this is that instead of trying to write a book about my ideas, I can DRAW a book about my ideas. Because, I’ve been finding it hard to verbally explain how I’ve been able to make accurate long range weather forecasts…I’m going to start.
So inspiring, am leaving here to immediately go onto your webpage to buy your book, Empire Life. Thank you for bringing such inspirational people onto your blog!! Loved it!
Thank you for having Brie on the Empire Life Blog!
This is my very. favorite. Empire Life Blog. EVER!
We’re rooting for you! – Mona
Thanks so much for sharing this article – this is everything that has been on my mind as well. Growth needs to be sustainable.
Way cool! Some extremely valid points! I appreciate you writing this article plus the rest of the website
is very good.
YES to each of us exerting our own little influence and contribution, and not underestimating any step of committed action.
Many, many thanks.
Ahaa, its good conversation concerning this piece of writing here on this webpage, I have read all that,
so now me also commenting here.
I so resonate with the framing that endless growth is not the goal – but THRIVING (through justice and equitable sustainability for Mama Earth, for all species and life forms, including humanity) is what we deserve to work towards.
I’m really enjoying the design and layout of your blog.
It’s very easy on the eyes which makes it much more enjoyable for me to come here
and visit more often. Did you hire out a designer to create your theme?
Fantastic work!
A big thank you for sharing this wonderful article.
Technically everything I do feels small, but I know it adds up across a lifetime – be that my writing, coaching, recycling, or helping someone in the street find their way, and sending this amazing article to every person I know.
These are actually impressive ideas on the topic of blogging.
You have touched on some nice points here. Any way keep up
writing.
I visited many websites but the layout feature for this website is superb.